| In a society where interaction is part of everyday life, | | | | other people are thinking that it can become |
| and other people form a vital part of life, other people's | | | | 'dangerous'. Many people fall into the trap of becoming |
| opinions are actually important in where we fit into | | | | practically obsessive about what other people are |
| society. However, we often think we know what other | | | | thinking of how we behave that everything that we do |
| people are thinking and base our actions around those | | | | becomes subject to what we think other people are |
| 'apparent' opinions. | | | | thinking. |
| Yet how do we actually know whether our | | | | So how do you stop being like that? First thing to do is |
| assumptions about other people's opinions are true or | | | | to recognise when you are making these assumptions |
| not? Frankly, we don't. This is where the Fundamental | | | | and when they are patently false, and put some kind |
| Attribution Error comes in. To put it into plain Engligh, it | | | | of system in place to prevent yourself from getting |
| means that we make a basic error in assuming other | | | | caught up in the negative cycle. One useful technique |
| people's thoughts without checking or otherwise | | | | is the Emotional Release technique taught in the |
| knowing whether we are right or not in that | | | | Sedona Method where you can quicly overcome the |
| assumption. | | | | obsessive nature that can sometimes come from the |
| We base these assumptions on our schema of the | | | | error. Another way is to understand why you have the |
| world (another Psychology term which means a | | | | schemas you do and to change them: often they are |
| system of beliefs we have about how the world | | | | out of date and are not actually helpful (as they are |
| works from how to order food in a restaurant to how | | | | supposed to be). They are also linked to the 'gremlins' |
| we 'should' live our lives). These schema are made up | | | | (if you're British you might know the term from the |
| from our experiences in the world, with some schema | | | | recent spate of adverts on TV advertising education) - |
| being made up from other people's schema which we | | | | but that's a future article. Fundamentally though, to |
| have picked up along the way: such as our parents' | | | | overcome harmful errors, it is all about understanding |
| and friends' schemas. | | | | when you make them and stopping them spiral out of |
| Now mostly, these errors are fairly harmless: it is when | | | | control. |
| we start living our lives entirely around what we think | | | | |